I do not often write a column after I have just written a funeral message. But I am today. In just a little while, I will go and preach the funeral of a man who was far too young to die, a man that had an infectious smile, a sweet personality, and a lot to live for.
I hate funerals, but I especially hate funerals like that.
I will call him Pete. I had not seen him in a few years, but for a short while, he attended my church. He started missing, and I started calling to find out why. So he came to see me, and we had a conversation. Pete informed me that he had a substance addiction and was going to get a week of treatment for it.
I have been doing this long enough to know that a week or two is usually not very effective in overcoming an addiction. So I told Pete that I could recommend a very good Christian treatment home, one that he could stay at for at least three months, possibly even six. Mind you, I am aware that many secular treatment centers do excellent work as well, but I, as a Christian and a believer in the power of God, am obviously going to recommend a Christian-based help source.
For all of the obvious reasons that would trouble you or me (job, family, pets), he declined to go that route. And just a few days ago, the addiction won the battle.
I am not able to relate to Pete or anyone else who has ever had a struggle with substance abuse; I have never drunk a single beer, never touched drugs, I have never even smoked a cigarette. But having dealt with addicts of all kinds for twenty-five years in the ministry, I know that addiction is a monster of the strongest order. It is even something that truly born-again Christians often struggle with.
Naturally, salvation is the best and first step toward victory. With the Holy Ghost living inside a person, anything is possible. But sometimes, the hold of the substance is so strong that it takes salvation plus lengthy assistance to break free and stay free. And that is where people who are currently struggling are going to have to make a choice, often a fairly drastic choice.
I am hoping that this paper and this column land in the hands of some people just like that. If it has, please let me talk to you personally right here in this column and say a few things that may help you.
First of all, your life is more important than a job. Any job. If you died tomorrow, your job would likely be filled by the end of the week. Why in the world, then, would you risk your life to keep a job? There have always been jobs; there will always be jobs. Prioritize your life over a job, and go get as much help as you need for as long as you need.
Secondly, your family, even your children, will benefit a lot more by you taking your broken self somewhere to get put back together than they will by you continuing on in your brokenness until it kills you. There is a great young gentleman in my church right now who faced that same choice, gave those same reasons why he could not go away, and then finally went away and got the help he needed. The six months of absence were a Godsend; he is a totally different man now, and his wife and children are enjoying the benefits of it every single day.
And please do not even say “pets” to me or to yourself. You are more important than any animal, period. Leave them with sitters, and go get help.
Thirdly, an addiction that you have spent years feeding is not easily beaten in a week or two. This is not a willpower game; it is a matter of giving your mind and body the chance to adjust to being free of the stimulant it has come to depend on for so long.
You may not fully understand this, but the devil hates you and wants to destroy you. 1 Peter 5:8 says, “Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour.” John 10:10 says, “The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy.” And because he hates you so badly, he lends his expertise to those who create dangerous and addictive substances. If we could create a microscope that could see into the spiritual world, the devil’s clawed print marks would be all over these evil substances.
In other words, this is really serious, really difficult, and it may, therefore, take some distance from your crowd, some lengthy time away, and some twenty-four hour a day help to gain the victory over, whether you choose a Christian treatment center or a secular one.
But you need to do it. You can do it. You should do it. There is a lot of life left to live; there is hope; there is help. Things will be fine while you are gone. And stuff can be replaced, even stuff like cars or house. But you? You cannot be replaced.
If you do choose to go get help and would like me to pray for you and yours while you are away, just email me. You do not even have to give me your full name, obviously, but I would be honored to pray for you and with you as you fight this battle.
Bo Wagner is pastor of the Cornerstone Baptist Church of Mooresboro, NC, a widely traveled evangelist, and the author of several books. His books are available on Amazon and at www.wordofhismouth.com